| How to lose a guy
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How to lose a guy
Have you ever considered you met "the one" just to find out he is "the lame one"! Don\'t worry, with these easy to go after guidelines you\'ll never have to deal with letting him know you just are not into him. By the time you end this he\'ll have hit the highway without seem back, and you\'re Scott free and guilt free!!
How to lose a gay tip 1 - Pick Up Filthy Habits: Don\'t hold back a single thing. All body noises are totally satisfactory! Belch, fart, snort, and sneeze, Cobb luigi\'s. But keep in mind, some losers think that this is a surefire sign that you are at effortlessness around him, so make sure you do them in inappropriate situations (dinner, around family and friends, library, office functions). Never say sorry for a single one either! This will soon start to turn him off bodily, or is he really that into you and quite disgusting himself.....which brings us to step 2.
How to lose a gay tip 2 - Make Animal Noises in Bed: Go ahead, get creative! Act like a monkey with sound effects and hop and crawl all around the bed. Growl like a tiger and claw him all over. Kiss like a lizard, while also hissing like a pissed off snake. When it comes to being soft and intimate, cats are the best answer. Purr in his ear, then start licking yourself (not him) while you lift one leg in an awkward stare. Always remember to play it off like its no big thing, and make the experience very animal planets most extreme!
How to lose a gay tip 3 - Cut down Him/His Family/His Friends: This one is a dozy! You may feel a bit guilty, but remember there is a wonderful purpose behind your madness. Tell him how much his body has changed over time (lard ass, muffin top, candles, double chin, man boobs, loss of hair, no package worth delivering). Act concerned with your motives, and always make disgusting faces while laying it to him. Tell his mom she talks too much, his dad you see where your boyfriend gets his ability to slack from, and his friends that they couldn\'t get laid in a morgue. Always remember, alcohol will help you not worry about what you are saying. It is a MUST!
How to lose a guy >
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